Not the Mother I Remember: A Memoir

Not the Mother I Remember A Memoir When Amber discovers cardboard boxes containing a lifetime of her mother s journals and letters she realizes she s been given a rare chance to unlock the enigma that had been her mother but will her

  • Title: Not the Mother I Remember: A Memoir
  • Author: Amber Lea Starfire
  • ISBN: 9780984863631
  • Page: 492
  • Format: Paperback
  • When Amber discovers cardboard boxes containing a lifetime of her mother s journals and letters, she realizes she s been given a rare chance to unlock the enigma that had been her mother but will her mother s writings reveal the woman she remembers, or someone else altogether Not the Mother I Remember tells the story of a sensitive girl raised by an exceptional and unconvWhen Amber discovers cardboard boxes containing a lifetime of her mother s journals and letters, she realizes she s been given a rare chance to unlock the enigma that had been her mother but will her mother s writings reveal the woman she remembers, or someone else altogether Not the Mother I Remember tells the story of a sensitive girl raised by an exceptional and unconventional woman during a time of social change, gradually exposing the true nature of their relationship and their extraordinary bonds.

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      Posted by:Amber Lea Starfire
      Published :2019-04-09T20:58:14+00:00

    One thought on “Not the Mother I Remember: A Memoir”

    1. I don’t usually want to read a memoir of a person I do not know who is not famous in some way. Outstanding artists, musicians, military heroes, and Presidents have been more of a draw for me. Fortunately, I took a chance and read this author’s memoir. It was a fascinating and well-written read. The story pulled me in rapidly and enticed me on with yet another adventure. I actually was sad when the book ended. Having reviewed a few memoirs recently, this one is my favorite. I expect it will s [...]

    2. "Not the Mother I Remember" braids together Amber Starfire's childhood story with the stories she found in her mother's journals. She writes with magical detail and great sensitivity, showing how our memories of life are personal and not necessarily the same as those who lived through the same times. I believe every woman should read this book to see the honest expression of love and to learn how individual perspectives can be so different. Every woman who reads this book will wish she had her m [...]

    3. There are two voices in this memoir - the author's and her mother (Jackie Carr)'s. Amber Lea Starfire offers an introduction to prepare the reader for the way in which the story is presented, which makes it easier to follow. Jackie Carr's voice is found mainly in her journal entries and correspondence, which were found when Amber was cleaning out her mother's home. This reader truly felt for the child whose mother was always occupied, a seemingly neglected child who almost appeared to be an afte [...]

    4. A brilliant book, it hurtles the reader though many decades of shambolic but exciting lives and lays bare the problems of a family living in the thrall of a mother who dominates their lives It's moving and powerful as, the author takes us through her own turbulent life as well as her mother’s, and with great skill, she looks at events that have happened around her with a sharp and sensitive eye, and you experience the characters and events as if the author is sitting in a chair beside you. The [...]

    5. Amber finds her mother’s journal writings after she died and discovering what went on in the mind of the woman who could fill her with an oozing “tar” of hatred. Her mother was a product of her own childhood issues as well as a woman of the 60s. Since my own mother was quite conservative, I was astonished—horrified—to read some of the things Amber’s mother did. This is not a mommy-dearest kind of book, though. Amber loves her mother and tries to understand her, wants to forgive her a [...]

    6. After a lifetime in the shadow of a strong-willed, non-conformist mother with a yen for adventure, Starfire discovered her mother's letters. They cracked her open in fascinating but discomfiting ways. The woman she discovered was even more complicated than the mother she grew up with. Weaving her own memories with her mother's revelations make this a uniquely compelling memoir. I was drawn into it and finished it quickly. I had the sense Amber still has some unfinished business coming to a sense [...]

    7. I was a first reads winner of the book "Not The Mother I remember:A Memoir"this is an honest recollection of a Daugher's like with her mother. This is Amber's memoir growing up with a rather eccentric mom. After her mother died. Amber whose born name was Linda came across journals her mother wrote for decades. the mother she thought she knew all these years surprised her with the thoughts she wrote down in her journals. I found the part where her mom Jackie took her two youngest kids at eight a [...]

    8. This well-written memoir is a poignant journey into the relationship between the author and her complicated mother. She paints a vivid picture of her mother as a bright, unconventional woman who was often thoughtless and destructive in her self-absorption. Her unrelenting quest for self-realization left a trail of broken relationships and damaged people in her wake. The stark contrast of her decline into the depths of Alzheimer’s is well-portrayed and stirring, her mother at turns infuriating [...]

    9. Mother –daughter relationships are complex under the best of circumstances. In her stunning memoir, Not the Mother I Remember, Amber Lea Starfire details the complexities of her own relationship with her mother through her dead mother’s journals and letters. What she discovers is both heartbreaking and transformative as she slowly unveils the meaning of her mother’s words and reflects on the perception of the mother she thought she knew. With raw honesty and vivid prose, she conveys the he [...]

    10. I could not put the book down. Although I read this book since over a year now, I can still recall the beautifully told memoir. The thrill of reading the story is still with me, it was enjoyable. What a wonderful, fun, exciting childhood the author had.

    11. This engaging memoir examines the mother-daughter relationship between Jacqueline Carr and her daughter Amber Lea Starfire. Jackie was an independent and awe inspiring woman. This teacher and writer traveled the globe and traversed the United States with a newly acquired pilot's license and two of her children. Probably her most treasured gift to her family was a box containing notes, journals and letters that was uncoverd by her daughter after her mother's passing. How many of us have the oppor [...]

    12. I began reading Amber Starfire’s book "Not the Mother I Remember" on a Saturday afternoon and was already halfway through it before I went to bed that evening. Simply put, I quickly became immersed in the story of Jacqueline “Jackie” Carr, teacher, writer, and mother of six, a woman determined to experience all life had to offer, despite how it affected her relationships with her children.The memoir begins with a preface describing how Starfire and her brothers make the decision to place t [...]

    13. Amber Lea Starfire did an amazing job of exploring the life of her mother through her mother’s own words. How lucky Amber is to have a mother who journaled the details of her whole life, and how lucky her mother might’ve felt to have a daughter who painstakingly pieced that crazy life together to share with the world.I can only imagine the shock she must’ve often experienced during a writing project this intense, but she didn’t give up. That in itself deserves a lot of praise.I really en [...]

    14. "Try to see it my way Only time will tell if I am right or I am wrong." —John Lennon & Paul McCartneyWhile the Beatles may have been singing about romantic relationships in their 1965 hit, "We Can Work It Out," the lyrics could easily be about the generation gap that became so apparent in that tumultuous decade. Expectations were shifting, especially for women, and Amber Lea Starfire's detailed memoir poignantly captures this moment in time through the parallel perspectives of her own chil [...]

    15. Being a seventy-year old male has its own set of attributes. I don’t suffer fools, waste my time, care about appearance, or worry anymore. I read mostly for enlightenment, which gives me pleasure. From memoirs I hope to gain a little more understanding of what life is about, what makes it interesting and what makes it worthwhile. I didn’t get much of what I seek from Not the Mother I Remember. Page after page described yet another instance of bad judgement alternating with pages of self-cent [...]

    16. The book "Not the Mother i Remember: A Memoire has a unique presentation of shifting between Amber Lea Starfire's memories and her mother's journals and letters; which Ms. Starfire finds following her mother's death. This two sided approach quickly plunges the reader into the details of their family life. The mother is presented as a complex woman with many inner struggles, and she has a difficult personality; which makes her hard to get along with. Ms Starfire is a born again Christian with a h [...]

    17. The Good. I read a lot of memoirs, but this mother/daughter interweaving of perspectives is, without doubt, one of the most satisfying I’ve ever read.The Mmeh Okay. Initially, like Linda/Amber, I questioned how a mother could justify making some of the choices she made for her family, though that doubt was short-lived.The Best Part. On top of Jackie’s admirable perspectives shared through letters to her daughter, my doubts started bending and curling and wilting after each letter. Jackie’s [...]

    18. I found this memoir horrifying and fascinating. Many of the author's recollections of her childhood were sad and disturbing. Yet the mother daughter struggle, especially among woman of post war era who struggled with the limited roles of wife and mother, struck a familiar chord. There were many reflections from both mother and daughter that echoed my own conflicted relationship with my mother and she with HER mother that made me wonder if it was somewhat inevitable given the times. The power of [...]

    19. When the author discovered a cache of letters and diaries following her mother's death she embarked on an emotional journey of rediscovery and reappraisal. Her family was pretty dysfunctional even by Californian standards and there are shocks aplenty along the way. On several occasions, Amber Lea Starfire (a pseudonym) says she both loved and hated her mother and it is not hard to understand the reasons for the ambivalence. Her mother was a writer too (though we learn little of her books), which [...]

    20. If you've ever read a memoir and wanted to know the whole story then read Not the Mother I Remember. Ms. Starfire manages to pull off a cool experiment, telling a story from two perspectives. In a fair and honest way the author studies the mother-daughter relationship. Jackie, the mother, is not an easy woman to love. She's intelligent, and independent, but she is also selfish. Amber strives not to be like her. It's a compelling memoir told in a clear and compassionate voice. Well done.

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